**Disclaimer... get a snack settle in and enjoy this post.. but I warn you it is a long one but in my opinion very well worth it! **
When an opportunity to visit San Antonio where I served my mission I had to take it! My dad was going to be out of town for 2 weeks and when my mom and I were talking about things she could do why he was gone she mentioned TOFW in San Antonio. She had been wanting to go to a TOFW ever since my first experience last year but it just never worked out. So...with 8 days to go she booked our flights and within 24hrs we were all set to go. We wanted to stay right on the "Paseo del Rio" (River Walk) for those not familiar with downtown San Antonio it is beautiful!
Things I love about Texas... the Texas flag flies at the same height as the American flag. People use the shape of their state for anything from stepping stones in front of their homes to cookie cutters (yes I have them!), HEB (best grocery store ever!), BLUE BELL ICE CREAM...YUM! ok.. i don't love this one it is just another funny memory..there is an unwritten law that all overweight men MUST work in their yard without wearing a t-shirt and in short shorts.
The weekend could not have been more perfect. I got to spend time with one of my favorite people –my mom! And on top of that, being spiritually recharged by attending the
Time Out Life Seminar (I had not been to this before and I would TOTALLY recommend it!) and of course the Saturday TOFW which did not disappoint. Another surprise was that my friend Sonia Lynn had just started a new job with Deseret Book a couple weeks before and was asked to travel with the TOFW seminar crew to get a better idea of how to perform her new responsibilities.
The weekend started with a visit to the dentist, not fun! I had been experiencing some pain above my jaw in my cheekbone and thought it was related to the sinus infection I had been to the doctor for on Monday. After a couple days of pain and realizing we were leaving on Thursday I had a feeling I should call the dentist to make sure this was in fact related to the sinus infection and not to some toothache that would get worse while I was out of town. My dentist asked me a few questions and determined it was probably a good idea that I come in just in case so he could run some tests to make sure it wasn’t something more serious. Well after 20min at the dentist’s office it was determined that one tooth was dead and I would need a root canal! It was about 2 hours before our flight took off and he said if I didn’t take care of this now it would get worse - especially while flying and I would be in a lot of pain. He promised to have me finished in 30min by putting on a temporary filling to get me through the weekend. Those that know me understand how terrifying this was.. I hate the dentist, not the man, but the experience. I get tense inside and am usually numb until well into the evening… I was not excited about the start of the trip but after it was all said and done it wasn’t as bad as I imagined it to be.
My mom was going to meet me at my house and we were to drive up to the airport together but after being at the dentist and running out of time we decided to drive separate. We did finally make our flight –barely!
Thursday evening we arrived in San Antonio around 7pm and were to our hotel by 8pm. We called Sonia Lynn and headed to the river walk for a late dinner. I have been back to my mission 3 times previous to this and there was only one time, with Brad, that I had experienced the river walk at night. I forgot how incredible it was! We found a Mexican restaurant, that ended up being not that great, but the ambiance was still fabulous! After dinner, we needed dessert. We walked around a bit more and ended up at Rocky Mountain Chocolate Company. My mom had us try the most amazing caramel apple with white chocolate, cinnamon, and sugar. We also showed Sonia Lynn some amazingly cheesy Texas souvenirs… ahhh the memories! As I walked around I was reminded of all the Texas “stuff” I had in boxes at home.
Friday morning was the Time Out Life Seminar, which was AMAZING! If you see one in your area you should definitely go. The speakers that day were Sheri Dew, Wendy Watson Nelson, Virginia Hinckley Pearce, and R. Wayne Boss.
Sheri Dew taught us how we as women can be better leaders within our families, communities, wards, and our careers. She also helped us realize as women we have more influence that we think we do. She said women are leaders of future leaders… "who has more influence on a man than his wife?” OR “on a child than his mother?” She told a story of when President Hinckley was being interviewed by the press in Washington DC, (she said this happened a lot) they asked him how he felt about the oppressed women in the church? He answered “We get out of their way and watch with wonder at all they accomplish!” She also demonstrated that in our church we have at 3 organizations in each ward or branch which give at least 12 women the opportunity to learn leadership skills. She said that if you include every ward, branch and stake throughout the church we have more opportunities for women to learn leadership than ANY other organization in the world.
Wendy Nelson talked about how Satan does not want us to have good relationships with our families and friends. He will do anything to help us be as miserable as he is. She talked about how powerful questions are in relationships. Instead of telling your husband or children “I love you”; ask them “Do you know how much I love you?” OR instead of “You are adorable”; ask them “Do you know how adorable you are?” She said questions can be powerfully healing…. “What can I do to learn from this difficult relationship experience?” “If you change your questions you can change how you think and feel.” She asked us to keep track of the questions we are asking ourselves every day.
How am I to be my true self? How can I be my better self?
Why am I so blessed? Why am I so cursed?
How do I tell my story? What is the story that got me to where I am today?
What beliefs are holding me captive? What beliefs are moving me forward?
“Painful or confusing life experiences can lead to constraining beliefs so that … you see things that AREN’T there and you DON’T see things that are!”
“If you were able to believe that the Holy Ghost was your constant companion, how would your words, ideas, or thoughts change?”
She also said if you are ever having a bad day to read Alma 5 –“There are great questions that invite us to reflect on our lives.”
Virginia Pearce talked about the importance of learning. We should be always looking for ways to increase our knowledge and be continually learning. She said “You should saturate your environment with things that invite the spirit, the books we read, music we listen to, TV or movies we watch and the people we associate with." When teaching others… “Find out what their need is and let them know how you can help that need.” She encouraged us to find out ways to increase our spiritual learning by using things like Preach my Gospel manual or other manuals. There was a lot more to her presentation but not enough time to document it all now.
Wayne Boss talked about power. He said most people misunderstand power and its influence. Once again… he had a lot of information that is hard to document. Luckily they gave us a manual that we could take notes on which makes more sense than writing it down could. He said “Power is the potential to accomplish what you want to accomplish.” He gave us a list of 8 or so “types” of power and then had us guess which type of power is most effective. He said “referent power was the most powerful… it is not WHAT you know but WHO you know, which is based on trust.” He told us not to ever do anything that causes someone to distrust you – it will limit your power.
What I have shared is only a small portion of what I learned in that one day. I have to admit when my mom suggested we go a day early and attend the seminar, I was not that excited but I am so glad we went.
Representation of the line drawn in the ground by Lt. Col. William Travis stating "Those prepared to give their lives in freedom's cause. Come over to me!" It was a tradition to bring all new missionaries to this spot by the Alamo and have them "symbolically" cross the line stating that we were "prepared to proclaim the gospel" (or something like that.. who remembers the exact phrasing?)
Friday we had a 3 hour break where we took Sonia Lynn to the Alamo. She had never been and wanted to see inside and get some pictures. We also watched the movie which gives a bit more background. Then we headed back to the River Walk to get some food. We went to another Mexican restaurant that Sonia Lynn, Laurel and others had gone the day before and it was amazing! I had remembered this restaurant from 3 years ago when Brad and I had visited for the Temple dedication. 
Mom, me and Sonia Lynn
Best Mexican restaurant on the River Walk!
The Casa Rio!
We then rushed back to the Time Out Friday event where Chieko Okazaki spoke, Hilary Weeks and Michael McLean performed. I haven’t seen Michael perform since I was in high school and he was pretty funny.. I love watching Hilary and the more I do the more I am amazed by her talent.
Chieko was great! She was a lot funnier than I expected and she really spoke from the heart. She spoke about a quote she found by Joseph Smith in this year’s Teachings of Presidents of the Church Lesson 24. Where Joseph Smith says “I teach them correct principles and let them govern themselves.” I found this quote the most interesting she said “Heavenly Father will not override free agency even to bless us!” I had never thought of it that way but it makes sense. He gave us our agency to allow us to “govern” ourselves, he teaches us correct “principles” but ultimately we still have our agency. Sometimes we are posed with conflicting “good” principles she said to look at both principles and determine “what decision will honor the free agency of those involved?” How do you teach correct principles? By precept and example. She also said “the most important 20 min a day are spent reading the scriptures to our children.” She gave an example of children in her 2nd grade class that would come to her to tell on another child in the class. She would not listen to them but tell them to sit on 2 chairs facing each other, then they were to talk out their issues which allowed them to “govern” themselves and “govern behavior”. She never had problems with the children telling on each other again. Some of the things she accomplished with 2nd graders were amazing… not enough room to document all.
We left after the break, talked with some of our friends & staff at the event, and then Sonia Lynn and I went to the workout room in the hotel.
Saturday I was able to meet up with another one of my favorite people- Jill and her roommate Hannah. Jill was a life saver to me at the end of my mission and her friendship means the world to me. We hadn’t seen each other in at least 3 yrs and yet it felt like just yesterday we had seen each other. I truly cherish friends like this- it does not matter how long we go between visits we can pick up right where we left off. The day was filled with incredible nuggets ….
Emily Watts quoted from a book on adversity by Carlfred Broderick “The gospel of Jesus Christ is not insurance from pain, it is resource in event of pain, and when that pain comes…rejoice that you have resource to deal with your pain.” Isn’t this a great quote? All too often we think by being a member of the church that we are “protected” from pain or trials. I love love love how he stated this. The gospel is so simple and yet we are constantly making it harder than it has to be. Great reminder!
They had a Q&A session and one of the questions was about how to keep balance with family, life, career, etc...Hilary answered this one. She gave 4 things that has helped her keep balance in her life.
1. Do all the things the Lord asks of us.
2. Read the scriptures every day – refill our well (she can always tell by how she reacts to her children if she has read that day or not.)
3. Good, Better, Best – talk by Elder Oaks. She always tries to choose the BEST.
4. Take time for yourself – she loves date night (spending quality time just talking and enjoying time with her best friend!)
“We need to MAKE time for scripture study” and “you can read D&C 25 in less than 3 min”. –Carolyn Rasmus.
“What are you NOT doing that prevents the spirit of the Lord from being with you?” “Are you feeling peace? Why not?” “First things to go when we are busy - scripture study and prayer” - Carolyn.
“Bad things CAN and DO happen to righteous people.” – Carolyn.
“Sometimes life breaks our bows!” - Chris Stewart
Jason Wright discussed the lost art of handwritten letters. He said a handwritten letter takes more time to process and write so it means more than an email, text, or typewritten letter.
Jill and me on the River Walk where there is a band that plays "the music of the Andes" - such great memories!
I hope that by reading this you will have a desire to attend a future Time Out for Women event, and hopefully something you have read has inspired you in some way.
After TOFW was over, Jill came with us to walk around the River Walk one last time before meeting up with some other friends of ours that evening. Here are some pictures of the River Walk.. isn't it amazing? I wish I had more pictures.
Saturday night we were able to go to the BEST Bar–B-Q place on the planet - Rudy’s! Beef brisket that melts in your mouth, spicy BBQ sause (yes they spell it with an “s”), and cheap white bread. Doesn’t get better than that! Love this place, and we were able to meet Mike, Susie, and kids there also! Jill came with my mom and me to drive around San Antonio a bit. We drove by the Temple which took us by the “great and spacious building” all you TSAMers out there know what I am talking about! We then drove all the way around 1604 to get to Rudy’s by Sea World. We had so much fun! Thanks Jill, Hannah, Susie, & Mike for an enjoyable evening.
San Antonio Temple
Jill, me, and Susie
Wow that was a long post! Those of you that read until the end can get 2 tickets entered into a raffle I will be having later this week. Make a comment so I know you read this last line! Thanks for reading!
